the heart of the forest.
*****
Those of you who read me here in this online journal
know that I am highly sensitive and empathic,
and at a ripe ol' age I am finding myself.
You know who I am.
I am meeting myself.
Last week was another week to go down in pencilfox history
and be pencil'd at great detail into my journal.
My journal.
That is where I truly find out who I am.
That is where I truly meet myself.
My beloved spruce tree at the back boundary of pencilfox acres
was taken over by the dreaded spruce bark beetle.
Last year this happened, and although the intent was to save my tree
it didn't happen.
It just could not be.
We decided to let the tree sit over the winter and be cut this spring.
It happened on Tuesday of last week.
I had already taken an early morning packwalk to say goodbye to my tree.
We have a long history, me and my tree.
It was heartmarked as mine when I first walked this property in 1988.
It was one of the deciding factors for purchasing this acreage.
Up on what I now affectionately name Coyote Hill is where I lived another lifetime ago
and where many many sled dogs were birthed, many of them under this tree.
This tree became known as Pluck's Tree because one very special pup was born
under this tree in 1990, being the only dog out of many that looked exactly like his sire
Cariboo.
Good-bye my friend.
May you mill beautifully.
May your spirit watch over Pencilfox Acres in perpetuity.
*****
Comments
I appreciate your expression of condolence. "Pluck's Tree" was something special, for sure.
xx
It has taken a long time to find the "right" coment to this post. I still haven't. So...
Many of your posts truly speak to me, deep in my soul. This one, especially so.
I discovered, at the start of the year, that I am An Empath. Apparently a fairly 'strong' one. I'm not sure what that means, but was a bit taken aback to learn that my being sensitive is not a fault, as I was raised to believe. The discovery of an actual term for my gift started me on a path of self-discovery. I've come to realize that many of my beliefs are not actually my own! Most are learned behavior from childhood. Crazy. I spent a good few days feeling lost, wondering Who am I then?, and now what?
So, similarly to yourself, I am getting to know me...kinda fun, kinda hard. The first thing I did was search, and find, my birth family, as I was adopted. Turns out I have a lot! of family...6 siblings.
So,cheers to you, and to me. May we like the women we discover we are!
Additionally, I may have mentioned, in an earlier comment, my tiny mountain home was completely decimated by wildfire last autumn. Since then, the clean-up crews have removed most of the remaining trees. My best friends are gone. I can hear them at night, the pain is a heavy thing for them...and for me. My little pup and I spend Sundays wandering the hills offering our blessings...in the form of small stone cairns, and prayers. Sometimes we sit with them for a bit, talk to them, cry. I'm afraid I'm developing a bit of a reputation. People around here are 'bummed' about the loss, and say things like Oh it will all grow back...even more beautiful!
I am still in mourning.
I hope you are able to retain your milled tree, or at least a piece. And that you can find a special way to honor your dear friend ♡
~s.
Sent from ProtonMail mobile
I shall definitely make it a priority when it comes to milling, I want a board from my tree. Not sure yet where it will be added to the house or wherever, but I want a memorial piece of wood. You're so right about that.
xx ~ marie.
I think the world has become unhinged. I am now being called out by my community members for "stacking stones". Apparently its damaging to ecosystems if you relocate stones. Ummmm....ok. However I'm pretty sure Mother Nature does this Herself. Sigh.
Also, I stumbled upon this and thought of you. I haven't actually read it yet, so please don't hold me responsible if it's crap, lol. Perhaps it will offer something helpful/useful..👍
https://otherworldlyoracle.com/empathic-spectrum-shielding/?fbclid=IwAR1e7Zkq1ZS_eN7zfTSazaTfkXJ4SQEi79nN_nJZ_kONf3WylvQh0w3PBN8
Be well, Sarita. I value your visits to my online journal, your comments. Continue to think for yourself. I like you that way. xx